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The Value of Venting

Oct 6, 2010

What a stupid #!*&. She doesn’t have a clue, and he’s an idiot. If it weren’t for me, this team would be nowhere. Did you hear what that moron said this time?

Ahhh… That felt good. Yeah, the value of venting – it’s good stuff. Done right.

Have you ever written a letter or email and not sent it, just for the relief of letting out some steam, of getting it off your chest, of releasing some pent-up frustration?

Have you ever written an angry email, meaning not to send it, but hit Send by mistake? Oops! Ouch.

The next time you’re really frustrated and upset, sit down and write out what you’d really like to say to that jerk. Then leave it. Just before going to bed, read it over, vent some more and promise yourself that you’ll add a little more in the morning before sending it. Then let it go. Know that you’ve said it, and that you’ll have a chance to say more tomorrow. Then think about something else – something or someplace that you can feel, hear, smell, see and maybe even taste. Take it in. Enjoy it. Know that you’ve got nothing more to say. Enjoy.

Next morning, read what you had written the day/evening before. If you need to say more, do so. Write more. Let ‘er rip. Go for the jugular. Say what you need to say. Blast them. Use obscenities if you want. Then leave it again for a while – let’s say until the end of the day. But know that you’ve gotten it off your chest, again.

When you’ve finally gotten everything you wanted to say down in words – don’t worry about it being grammatically correct – let it sit for at least another three hours. Then stop and think whether you really want to say what you wrote. If you decide to send it, take at least thirty minutes to think about the consequences. What will happen when the recipient gets this letter/email?

If you decide to not send it, you have two options: You can delete it or tear it up and throw it in the garbage, or you can save it in a special Venting Folder. I’d strongly recommend that this folder be somewhere where no one but you could ever find it. Secure it.

I have a few letters “locked” away in a special file – some with language that is not my usual! They actually make for fun reading months and years later. Makes me feel good. And putting it down on paper is far more powerful and useful than it is just talking about it.

Now, where was I, you stupid git? Ahhh, yes, venting. Sometimes, it’s good for the soul.

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